Love Apple. Love Macs. Love the iPhone. That being said, AT&T can perish in the ungodly flames of the ninth circle of hell.

The iPhone 3G S, the must have item in the eyes of every geek and wannabe geek this and that side of the Mississippi. (When did people WANT to be geeks? Damn you Battlestar Galactica!). I don’t really care about the 3G S, I mean, I want one but I’m not about to start looking for change in the couch cushions to find enough for it. There are some cool features but a lot of those lie within the 3.0 software update, which I already have so…why would I want to shell out money I don’t have for something I don’t need? Because, I wants it. And when you wants something it’s an adult responsibility.

Let me go back; I was moving from Starkville about a month and a half ago when I tripped and fell with my iPhone 3G in my pocket. Yes, I’m fat. Get your laughing out now. Done? Okay, okay, I’ll wait.

I hate you.

Moving on, there was a huge crack left down the middle of my screen, essentially splitting the thing itself into two. The phone works great, no problems whatsoever than me hanging my head in shame and demanding a strict diet of water and saltine crackers so I don’t do something like that again. I contacted AT&T to see what could be done about getting myself a new iPhone at the time: no dice. I wasn’t “elligible” for an “update” until “August” so I’d be paying an “arm” and a “leg” and stop doing “this” Derek. That’s fine, I’d go to plan B: the “friendly” people at the Apple Genius Bar. “Yes sir! We can fix that screen for you at the low, low cost of $199.99 + tax.”

::glares::

“Isn’t that what I paid for my iPhone 3G back last year?” “Yes sir! But it’s also what it costs for a screen replacement, unless of course you want a new iPhone, in which case you’d need to be ‘elligible’…”

“Yeah I got that Copernicus, thanks. So you’re just going to walk back there and open up a new iPhone box and give me a new phone if I want a replacement screen, and charge me $199.99 or I can ask for a new iPhone and that will be $375!?”

“Oh no, sir! We do replace the screen at the low, low cost of $199.99″

“And I still have to keep my old phone at that price?”

“Why yes sir, we only replace the screen at the low, low price of–”

“$199.99 – I got it Einstein – what in the hell kind of gambit are you running here?”

“You want to know a secret sir?”

“Yes, please – entertain me ‘Genius.”

“AT&T sucks. There’s a new iPhone coming out in about 2 months.”

“I realize this but that doesn’t aid me in the here and now.”

“Just wait, the 3G is going to go down on a huge price break and you won’t have to pay for an upgrade, you can just swap out your phone for a really low cost.”

“THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH, CHIP.”

Fast foward to Monday, June 8th. The iPhone 3G S is announced starting at $199.99 and the 3G will now only be $99.99. HUZZAH! So I figure my poor little cracked iPhone was worth getting a fresh new version for less than 100 bucks. So what do I do? Go to AT&T today for my iPhone replacement at a cool $99.99. Guess what? “Sir, you’re not “elligible” for an “upgrade” as of “today”.”

::glares::

I don’t want to upgrade you college reject, and stop looking at me like I’m the antichrist for already having 3.0 on my phone, it didn’t hurt anything. Give me my new 3G phone. “Oh yes sir that will be $199.99″. THAT’S THE COST OF A NEW IPHONE 3G S!!!.

“Well yes sir, but not for you, because you are not elligible for an upgrade your cost for a 3G S would be $499.99.”

After explaining to the gentlemen I did not want a 3G S next week, that I only wanted a new 3G at today’s price of $99.99, he seemed to understand.

“Oh, no problem then sir. That will be $199.99″

You see where this is going?

I read on Apple’s website that there would be NO upgrade charge from a 3G to a 3G but apparently AT&T felt differently about that. So even though the cost for the 3G has gone down, I’m still paying outrageous prices because I’m not “elligible” for an “upgrade” and “holy crap” there I go again.

So then the guy tells me (you’ll love this) there’s an authorized Apple repair place in Tupelo. Right here. And they replace iPhone screens. Under warranty. For $40.

::glares::

I never really understood the term “going postal” until today but after 90 minutes of standing in that place arguing with his acne faced/plauged self and two other girls that didn’t know the iPhone from a pay phone, I finally figure out where this retailier is and go see him. Oh it’s a world of difference there. There’s music playing and pretty girls greeting you and free beverages and no lines or waiting. Heaven.

“Yes sir I’m out of screens today but I can fix yours at 9am in the morning in less than 10 minutes and it won’t void you out with Apple or AT&T at all.”

Genius.

Hey AT&T – how about throwing a bone to some customers you already have instead of enticing just new people? $500 for the new iPhone for people who have been using you for years looks like a big “GFY” to some loyal customers.

If you’re an AT&T customer who wants what they deserve, check out these petitions and add your name. I doubt it will do a thing, but anything can happen and this is a huge mistake on AT&T’s part. A price break at the very least would be appreciated.

http://www.petitiononline.com/IPHONE3G/petition-sign.html

http://twitition.com/f96aq

http://www.computerworld.com/action/article.do?command=viewArticleBasic&taxonomyName=knowledge_center&articleId=9134218&taxonomyId=1&intsrc=kc_top

I’ve always been an avid DVD collector, I had about 4 titles bought before I even owned a player back in late 1997. I managed to get the first player in my hometown. Anyways, all that to say that 11 years later I have around 1,930 DVD’s and (of course) everything moves forward and of course there’s something new out there…actually two new things: HD & BluRay. I held out for awhile to see who would reign supreme and in late November of last year I really thought HD was going to prevail with Microsoft’s backing, but unfortunately after about three weeks of me giving in, purchasing two HD players, and gaining about 50 HD titles; BluRay won supreme. That sucked. But now I’m on the BluRay wagon, trying to get my catalogue updated and as only a few titles become available at a time in high definition (either due to studios backing HD formerly or just not announcing these releases) I thought I’d share the top 10 titles I’m anxiously awaiting for hi-def release:

#10 – Star Wars Sextuplets
This one ends up at the bottom of my list because I’m scared of yet another release of these films. While the prequel trilogy has only had one dip into the DVD realm, the original (and far superior) trilogy seems get screwed over on DVD time after time. Will their be an ‘original’ and ’special edition’ BluRay? Will Hayden still show up as Anakin in both versions of “Jedi”? God, I hope not. I’ll get them when they come out, but at this point, it’s staying at the bottom of my list.

#9 – Armageddon
A decent flick for it’s time and I still enjoy the story and effects. It’s got pretty good “rewatchability” and would look flippin’ grand on BluRay in my opinion: See Bruce Willis detonate into a million different pieces.

#8 – Batman
The original 1989 film in glorious hi-def. Great addition to any collection and I wouldn’t mind having Beetlejuice or Pee Wee’s Big Adventure while I’m at it.

#7 – Heat
The quintessential bad ass film – Pacino and DeNiro? Awesome. I’m hoping with the late-summer release of “Righteous Kill” – we’ll see “Heat” get released to try and cash in and capitalize on the duo, even though they’re from separate studios.

#6 – Ghostbusters 1 &2
I want that larger than life feeling again when seeing these two films – I’m anxiously awaiting the video game coming out later this year so hopefully (since it’s Columbia Tri-Star in the first place and Sony is BluRay) we’ll see these released in time to enjoy the game as well. No DVD set would be complete without these titles.

#5 – 007 Films
We were given “Casino Royale”, but I think it’s time to head all the way back to Dr. No and move forward, maybe in time for “Quantum of Solace” in theaters. I think it would be cool if they released one Connery/Moore/Dalton/Brosnan a month until completely caught up. And of course, Lazenby. I need my “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service” – great Bond film and book.

#4 – Mel Brooks Films
All of these need to be available in good hi-def releases with great features. “Young Frankenstein” is one of the best movies of all time and they’re all cinematic classics so having them in BluRay is a good move. Plus I think having “Silent Movie” in BluRay is just funny.

#3 – Indiana Jones Quadrilogy
Enough said – if there is a God we’ll see a release before “KotCS” gets a DVD release. I didn’t pick up the recent trilogy release before the fourth film’s theatrical release because I knew BluRay was foreboding. I’ve got my old trilogy to hold me over until all four come to high-def.

#2 – Pixar Films
I never even got to see “Cars” or “Ratatouille” and they’re already on BluRay? Who cares? I want the good Pixar films on BluRay – I’m sure “Wall*E” will see an immediate BluRay release after it’s theatrical run, but that scares me that we might not see “Toy Story” 1 & 2 until “Toy Story 3″ comes around. And does that mean we have to wait longer for “Monster’s Inc.” “The Incredibles” and “Finding Nemo” ? I hope not. Films are way too great to not be on the shelves and in my player.

#1 – Back to the Future
I’d already started this post before news came about of Robert Zemeckis showing a new digital transfer of the first film over the weekend and announcing it was made for an upcoming high-def release. Awesome. Hopefully all three will be available at once and with some new special features. Now that Indy is a a foursome and Star Wars went the 6-route, Back to the Future really is the ultimate and best trilogy out there.

Honorable Mentions:

Smallville – Season 6 and soon to be 7 are available for BluRay – time to go back and get seasons 1 – 5 out as well.

Bourne Trilogy – I picked up all 3 on HD-DVD, but they’re worth another dip on BluRay

Kevin Smith Films – Clerks 2 made it to HD-DVD, but now it’s time to go back to the start with Clerks and work forward on BluRay. Somehow Jay and Silent Bob has already gotten a BluRay release (don’t ask me how?) so it would be good for the others to follow suit.

The first film I ever saw in theaters was Back to the Future 2, to this day it remains my favorite film of all time. If we’re friends then you’re aware of my obsession, and you know that taking me to counseling only makes me want to wear life preservers and skateboard more. My one thing in life that has always given me a good sense of balance and an escape from whatever real life stuff was going down was the cinema. There was always something about it as a kid, the dark room, the movie trailers, the larger than life screen – all of it encompassing a fun experience that I tried to catch every weekend, as often as possible.

Lately, the thing I used to love most in life is depleting. Everything I once loved is now trivialized and compromised for the all mighty dollar. I hate commercials in front of trailer, I hate text messaging and phone calls from the other so-called “movie-goers”, and I despise technical difficulties. It’s 200-freakin-8, get it right! I was like 12 years old before I remembered actual faults with the equipment, granted before that point I was probably too mesmerized to take notice but it seems like I can’t see anything today without massive problems; some belonging to the movie, some to the individual theater.

I am a stickler for continuity errors, they’re like magnets to me – I can’t ignore them. If a cup was on the table, then gone, then magically there again – It screams out to me like Paul Shaffer smoke alarm. I see reflections of crew in mirrors and boom mics in shots and just about everything else I can think of. Now I know what kind of undertaking making a movie is, don’t get me wrong – that’s why finding these things is more of a game to me than an annoyance. I love the “ghost” in the corner of Three Men and a Baby as much as the next guy, and now with technology being what it is, most any mistake not caught by theatrical release is surely fixed by it’s DVD debut. My guff rarely falls with the filmmakers, or even with the continuity professionals on set because mistakes happen, I know that better than anyyonee.

It’s not Hollywood that’s really ruined the movie going experience for me though, I still love movies as much as I did when I was a kid and my 1900 DVD’s (yes, alphabetized) on the shelf behind me prove that I’m still a stickler for anything that blows up followed by a good one-liner. It’s more the local cinema that I have beef with in 2008. I’m not a fan of paying $10 for less of an experience than I got when I paid $5. Now I know I’m not the first (nor the last) to complain about this, much less on a “blog”. My voice will echo off and die out in the distance with a thousand others but it’s my damn site and I’ve had my 15 minutes of fame in life already so I’m going to bitch and moan with the rest of the world on this one.

I saw Cloverfield in theaters three times, do you know why? First viewing was opening night, and with a movie with that much hype, that was my own fault. I sat behind a row of seventh graders who were more interested in taking pictures and video of the movie than enjoying a pretty good flick. But we’ll get back to my complaints of what I like to call “opening-night-assholes”. Second viewing was in my hometown in a much smaller, older mall-embedded theater where the audio cut out every 10 minutes, which made a film like Cloverfield very hard to appreciate it. My third and final attempt to get it right was the worst disaster of them all, where the reel broke with 10 minutes left in the film and the theater decided they wouldn’t be refunding the 12 or so of us viewing after the error. I think everyone else let it go but I wasn’t about to go down without a fight on that one, as I chased down a general manager and demanded my money back. He quipped that I saw more than 85% of it and that sufficed. No dice. I got my $7.50 back and three coupons.

This past weekend I saw Sex and the City in a screen outside my city (no comments please) and everything was off balance. Unfocused picture, poor audio, and a jumping screen that had everything screwed up for the 2 1/2 hour girl-fest I was privy to, and all the girls dressed up as Carrie or Miranda made it hard to find someone official to complain to anyways. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not a big complainer because I know it rarely helps anything, but there’s a line that sometimes needs to be crossed when mistake after mistake mounts up against the enjoyable experience. I’ve already put in an email to the manager of that theater, which I know I’ll never hear back from – but throwing in that I’m a screenwriter and a film producer from L.A. doesn’t hurt, does it?

Now as opening night megarama goes, I hate it. I’ve had this endless argument with countless film critics, geeks, and average moviegoers – I cannot stand seeing a big film on opening night with all the other idiots of the world coming out of the woodwork. I saw all the Star Wars (prequel and re-releases) on opening night, the Star Trek films, the comic book movies, the remakes, everything – if it had the notoriety of having enough people to form a line hours before the first showing, I was there. This ended back in 2006 when I saw Superman Returns at an advanced screening. I could not stand it. People screaming and yelling and jumping up and down when Supes took off, stupid. I’m as big a fan as anyone (especially Superman) but there’s a time and a place for talking about a scene or a special effect, and that is NOT when it’s happening on screen. It was that night that I called it quits, since then I’ve enjoyed weekday afternoon of the big title films, where it’s usually me and four other people with nothing better to do, and sense enough to keep their traps shut and enjoy a damn movie. Batman Begins, Transformers, Die Hard 4, Indy and the Crystal Skulls, all afternoon, low population, fun. I slipped up on Cloverfield but that was due to that damn ingenious viral marketing. Damn you J.J. Abrams! I love it.

I guess all in all it’s no one person’s fault for today’s movie going experience. The theaters have the crappy equipment (I’m more than 75 miles from the nearest DLP cinema), the regular patron doesn’t know DeNiro from Pacino anymore, and there’s more product placement advertisements than there are movie trailers to enjoy, thus ruining my fun in getting to the movie fifteen minutes earlier than anyone else. Unless ScreenVision wants to hire me and my knowledge to work on the opening trivia, behind the scenes looks, and upcoming peeks – I’d rather stare at a dark screen and movie score music in anticipation for something that used to cost less than a McDonald’s happy meal. It’s getting to the point where I’d rather shell out $100 to rent the screen to myself for a viewing than share with undeserving people (yes, undeserving) who ruin my night for me. Then maybe I can jump up and down and yell things at the screen when Superman flies away or Batman gets the bad guy. I’ll take one for “Hypocrite” at the 7:30 showing.

I remember a time when sex used to be what sold in Hollywood, it’s not really that way anymore. It’s all about sequels nowadays. Anything the corporate machine can do to propagate a franchise and poke fun at aging actors in roles that may or may not compromise the position they’re in when jumping off buildings, driving backwards through tunnels, or remembering to take their Metamucil.

Now I’m as much a fan/critic as anyone else, I know plenty of people in Hollywood, I’ve worked for John Schneider for a couple of years now, and I could start my own film website and tear every new blockbuster to shreds if I so desired. But I like Hollywood, it’s fun. It’s a place to forget my own life for a few measly hours and enjoy something that’s eye pleasing and sometimes, yes sometimes, thought-provoking. I’m a sucker for sequels at that because I enjoy the references to the past, the clever ways to further a story, and do-anything-to-shock-a-return-audience right into seeing it again and again before the DVD hits the shelves.

A couple of summers ago there was a surge in trilogies; Shrek 3, Spider-Man 3, Pirates of the Caribbean 3, and a few other third titles were hitting the screens to an almost alarming rate. I was not a big fan of any of those three titles, nor was I of their #2 successors.

#Four seems to be where it’s at lately.

I know you might think I’m crazy, but there’s a certain trend to the craft that makes the fourth installment of series the one worth returning to. My first instance of this is Live Free or Die Hard, originally titled Die Hard 4.0. Now before you write me off, think about the caliber movie this was given we first met John McClane 20 years ago, in the best Christmas movie ever. I groaned and argued as well as thousands of other fans when I heard the fourth film would carry a PG-13 rating, dampening the gritty death and dialogue I’m used to in a Die Hard film. I advise you, whole-heartedly, that if you have yet to see the Unrated version on DVD, go buy it now and it breathes new life into the movie – John throws around the f-bomb every few seconds (I still don’t know how they did that in ADR when it wasn’t in the original track, but I *expletive removed* love it) lots more killing, lots more action, and hella more intense than what I saw in the theaters 3 times in the summer of 2007. Seeing the movie in a raw, director’s cut light made it my second favorite of the franchise (next to the original) and made parts 2 and 3 trail behind it. Die Hard remains in my top 10 films of all time, and stakes it’s claim as one of my favorite franchises with a very, very worthy quadrilogy.

There are a few other lessons in this little rundown, including Indiana Jones. Now it’s split down the middle all over the world – people either loved Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, or they despised it. Put me in the former of the two. My buddy Steve (of Geek Out Loud, over at www.geekoutonline.com – that’s $20, Steve) had the same reaction as me, having a huge grin on our faces through the entire duration of the film. I felt like I was 4 years old all over again, the music, the action, the hat – all of it. A true Indy fan can accept the the story for what it was and enjoy a fun two-hour ride through nostalgia. I’m not going to bring personal beliefs into the mix, but you could pretty much argue that an alien on screen is no different than “God in a box” or a 700 year old Knight sitting in a cave twiddling his thumbs. I had a good time, and it was definitely a sequel worth waiting for minus a few creative complaints (I walk out of the theater when Shia starts swinging from vine to vine.) <<Note: For my Twitter bet on Shia’s amount of “No’s” throughout the film see Youtube video – He replaces them with “Woah’s”. See: Waterfall scene. >> Regardless of not-so-stellar casting, it was good to have an old friend back. Admit it, if we had waited nineteen years and gotten “Temple” instead of “Kingdom” – wouldn’t you be a little upset? More than a little. Freakin’ travesty. Indy 4 – okay in my book, didn’t rape my childhood, and has the re-watchability of Raiders or Crusade for me.

My last example, and probably the most damning against my argument, is Rambo, originally titled John Rambo, and hopefully will be again when Stallone gives us the director’s cut I’ve been wanting to see. Here’s a franchise that nobody thought we’d see again, everyone rolled their eyes, and in the end I think everyone was pleased. Dare I say Oscar worthy? Stallone’s direction is amazing, and Glenn MacPherson (Director of Photography – the unsung heroes of films) did an outstanding job with this shockingly-raw film (Gotta love the guy, he was DoP on Wrongfully Accused – one of my favorite Leslie Nielsen films). First Blood is the best (as were Raiders and the original Die Hard) but this one really made you wonder why we had to sit through two other sequels to get to this point. Time. It really is money! Who knew? This movie would have been awful if it came out when First Blood: Part II did – you need an aging John Rambo to make it all the more gritty. You need the aging Indiana Jones in the 1950’s to show what’s happened since the Last Crusade; and John McClane needs a few years on him to make him all the more desperate to save the day when everything is on the line. Rambo is the quintessential fourth installment of a franchise; it’s fun, it’s intelligent, and even though the body count is one of the highest of a film I’ve ever seen, you still have a smile on your face when you see Sly jumping out of the dark in the rain and cracking someone’s neck. If Stallone wanted us to see a “real” Rambo movie and still have a good time; then mission accomplished.

Maybe it’s just the seasoned veterans of films I love in a sequel-go-around but if their truly are no more original ideas in Hollywood, I’d rather see Indiana Jones survive an atomic bomb blast in a lead-lined refrigerator than a Bill and Ted or Red Dawn (please don’t suck) remake.

If the first film is what set’s the tone, the second is the summer revival o’ fun, and the third is where it’s the company’s paycheck before the filmmaker’s design, the number four is a retooling that I welcome because I feel like I’m a kid again sitting in the theater and having a good time, instead of correcting every factual mistake, finding every continuity error, or catching a boom mic in the shot. Lately I’ve felt like a younger-me all over again in the movie-going experience and if growing up means I’m not going enjoy myself, then I’ll just stay five years old forever.

Ya know what? At this point, who cares? Don’t get me wrong, I love Lost (and I type it as “Lost” because I cannot stand it when people prefer to label it “LOST” – it insists upon itself) but I gotta tell you, I’m getting more than a little put out. (No spoilers in this thought provoking post.)

If you know me, you know I’m not a fair-weathered TV fan. I’ve seen television programs that I love come and go and in most all instances, I’ll stay by it’s side until the bitter end, though it rarely ever grips my hand and names me in it’s will as it goes out the window. Regardless, if I invest my time into something like I have Lost or countless other programs, I’m there to see it through, and a few poorly written episodes do not throw me off the trail. But lately I’ve been feeling remorse for the show. When I heard ABC enforced an end date for the series, I was honestly really happy to hear it because I thought the endless psycho-babble that is continuing from week to week (and hella long hiatus after hella long hiatus) needed to have an expiration date added to it to keep it fresh and have that oh-so sought after ending that everyone believed has yet to exist.

Let me tell you something, I’ve had more broken off dinner plans, more hung up phone calls, and more shady friendships happen over this program – which has to say something about it’s fanbase. Again, I’m a huge fan and tonight’s finale was no exception. I haven’t missed an episode all season and since I called the cliffhanger of last season’s finale within the first 3 minutes of the episode (seriously, I did, and have witnesses to back me up) I was hoping for a caliber episode that lived up to a better-than-last-season…season. I didn’t get it. They highly overhyped this finale based on the surroundings of this season, plagued by the Writer’s Strike as most everything in the industry was. I guess the quality just isn’t there for me anymore, it’s not as thought provoking and intelligent as it used to be. Season 1 and 2 to me were about knowledge, and these last two seasons have been more about a trail of bread crumbs that lead nowhere and have me looking at my watch halfway through an episode. Again, don’t get me wrong – I really enjoyed this season and the way they set things up but I really just want the knowledge more than furrowed brow. Thats not to say I want to know how it ends, I love the journey and the puzzle pieces in getting there – but it’s becoming a trend that I can’t even keep up with the picture on the jigsaw box to know which pieces go where.

I like to think I’m a pretty intelligent guy, I can figure things out pretty well, I pick up on subtle differences and hidden text but there’s a certain formula to Lost that has been poured onto the table and is hiding behind every nook and cranny. But I digress, I do love the Lost, I did enjoy the finale, I just wish that when a network does a setup for a big finale they do it right, they do it justice, and they pay it respect. I think Lost gets sucked down the tube of marketing that rarely has anything to do with the show and everything to do with anything else. I got a little irked when I heard that the two remaining seasons of the show will now have 2 extra episodes each (I believe that’s correct) tagged on to the end due to the strike. Do they really need it? They’ve got their end time set and they’ve got all these flash-forwards going, so do they need extra time to fulfill their journey? I honestly think that while the flash-forwards were a good way to end season three and start out season four, it did get a bit trite as the season continued. I think the Oceanic 6 storyline would have been better suited for later in the series, maybe in the fifth season as a final big step to the end. It’s hard to picture where to go from here, will the show get to a point where there are no longer flashbacks and forwards and there’s only the here and now on the island?

I love Lost. I loved “There’s No Place Like Home”. I love Lost fans everywhere, I just think that when a series is facing it’s final thirty or so episodes, it should start looking like it.